| Morgan Peters | We moved the basketball hoop and there were earthworms under it. Morgan ran over and started picking up the worms and putting them in the grass. Ten minutes later I (Morgan's dad) said "are you ready to play basketball yet??". Morgan replied "No worm left behind Dad!!!".
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| Gayle Dessuit | When my son was a toddler, he called excitedly from the bathroom,"I have a bug! I have a bug!" I quickly came only to discover that he was thrilled that his jeans had a fly in the front rather than an elastic waistband.
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| Rachel Medenhall | My 3 year old daughter, Gwendolyn, and I were going to garage sales one weekend. I knew we were getting close to our next stop so I told her to keep her eyes peeled for garage sale signs. She said: "Mom, my eyes aren't bananas, they don't peel!".
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| Katherin Swarner | Current conversation in the house: Mommy to Daddy- are you still eating? Daddy to Mommy- are you still talking? Then Bella burst out to Daddy- are you still talking out of your anus? (She learned it earlier this week and it's her new favorite word).
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| Peggy Way | While at a recent baptismal service at our church my 6 year old daughter leaned over to me and said: "I don't think I want to be baptized" When I asked her why she replied "Cuz I DO NOT like getting my socks and pants wet!"
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| Peggy Way | I add to our household income by selling items on ebay. Our 5 year old daughter had apparently put much thought into what I would want for a Mothers Day gift this year. As she handed me a flower & card she had made said "I really wanted to get you a Junky Toy to sell on ebay but I could'nt find any when Daddy took me to Wal-mart!"
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| Peggy Way | One day after work my husband needed to run some errands and asked our 6 year old if she wanted to go along. He told her first he needed to stop off and check himself in the mirror (to remove some dirt from work) Our daughter assured him "You look perfect dad and you don't even look like you are going bald" . . . .
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| Peggy Way | One morning I walked in the bathroom to find our 5 year old setting on the edge of the tub, running her "tooth brush" across the bottom of her soapy feet. When I asked what she was doing she said her feet were really stinky & she was making them clean like her teeth!
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| Peggy Way | Our 6 year old daughter Autumn wants all the toys advertise on T.V. One morning after she was done shouting the number they advertise to call and order, she followed up by "Please, please, please! . . .oh, but you have to 18 to order. How old are you Mommy?" (I informed her I was 48 years old) "WOW! YOU COULD HAVE ORDERED A LONG, LONG, LONG TIME AGO!"
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| Robyn Walsworth | Our daughter was almost 3, with tons of battery operated toys. When batteries died in her favorite toys she brought them to us and asked for new batteries. Fishing at my inlaws’ cottage she caught a little fish. My husband through it back. Moments later it was floating. She asked, “What’s wrong with the fishy mommy?” I replied, “Oh, honey, it died.” She said “Papa, do you have any new batteries, the fishy is dead?!”
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| Sandra Gallegos | My son Christian was about 12 years old and he was home alone, he took a phone message for me, when I asked if anyone had called he said , "yeah, Celine Dion called for you." I said "What?? and checked caller ID. It was my hair salon. So I asked "do you mean Salon Diva?" He replied "umm yeah that might be it."
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| Levi Taylor | Levi was very upset when he saw a scan of his own artwork on his mommy's computer that had been emailed to Grandma. Frowning, he asked "You sent that through the computer?". "Yes" Mommy said confused as to why he was mad. But then it became clear when he growled "I wanted to keep that!".
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| Lois Broughton | When my youngest daughter was in kindergarten, I bought a series of Time Life books with photos of paintings from the great art museums of Europe. One day I found my six year old giggling at nudes. I explained that she shouldn't laugh, and that it was art. A few weeks later I heard her explaining to a friend from school: "You can always tell Art. He's the one with no clothes on."
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| Barb Buzanowski | My grandaughter came home from school complaining that there was a boy in her class that was teasing her. Moms advice was to simply ignore him. "What's that?", asked Molly. "That's when you don't pay any attention to anything they say or do", replied mom. "Oh, said Molly, you mean like what you do with dad?"
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| Kristy Marasco | Sammy (our 4 year old boy) says to his Daddy, "Daddy mommy loves me more because I was in her belly" Daddy says: That's only because I put you there!
Sammy says: How did you put me there, through her mouth?
Mommy says: Daddy wishes!
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| Amy Martin | While grocery shopping at Town N Country a woman knocks over a wine display and wine spills everywhere. My 5 yr old daugter said eww mom what is that stuff it stinks. I reply it's called wine and she says is that like beer I said sure I guess so I dont like wine or beer so I dont know. She says remember when i had beer mom? as other people heard her and looked at me like im a horrible mom and I said What? you've never had beer sweetheart. She says yes mom remember that sucker I had rootbeer and I didnt like it. Everyone immediately starts laughing and I said honey thats a flavor of pop and she goes well its beer to me and I dont like it. Selena-age 5
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